Interview The Chronic Staff thought It their duty to send the Chronic's roving reporter up to Camperdown to interview Miss Leiinda Bee, the world-famous film star who has come to South Africa to make the film "The Lice of the Lion". Here is now a written commentary on the lengthy conversation which took place: Question: Miss Bee, have you hard of Kearsney College? Answer: Well, honey, not actua-aally, but I have heard of the wonderful rugger team you people have, and above all I hear you have the cutest little masters. Question: Er... perhaps yes, er...you were taken to the dance by one,weren't you. Miss Bee? Answer: Not really, cutie. I took him, as a matter of fact. Question: Miss Bee, perhaps you could tell our readers who this budding Romeo is? Answer: I think his name was Mr. , babyface. Question: What did you think of him? Answer: Well...er... he had the cutest little pony-cart. Question; Miss Bee, what do you think of sunny South Africa? Answer: Primararally, I don't think it is very sunny, but otherwise I just dig It. I have been trying to pick up some ofthe country dialects; one ofthem is called Africans. Question; What words have you picked up so far? Answer: Well, there are "hambergashlie'',"fanagalo", and "footsack". Miss Bee was now called back to location and with a cheerful "totsiens"she left us. Footnote After the last Chronic many innocent-minded readers sent in letters asking the meaning of the words "temporary deputy vice sub editors". Many thought this ingenuous phrase meant "deputy sub editors who were in charge of temporary vice". Others were under the horrible misconception that it meant "deputy editors who were in charge of temporary vice in sub marines",and yet others, I'm sorry to report,took it to mean "Editors who were in charge of deputy vice in temporary submarines". Naturally, the Editorial staff were shocked to find that this innocent phrase had been interpreted to such a shabby meaning, and have therefore decided to make the "temporary deputy vice sub-editors" just plain "vice editors". Guess! Guess who arms himself at the tuckshop with a fly-swatter. Guess which popular Latin master has become assistant groundsman. Guess who interrupts every meal with silence. Guess who has taken a course in psychology. Guess who attended a swimming Gayla on Saturday while everyone else went to a swimming Gahla. Guess who is a keen yachtsman. Guess who shot a crocodile. Guess who writes his rugby notices in technicolour. 306
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